You might also have exclaimed with overwhelming joy after perusing a celebrity's chit chat in Hyd Times...
And NOW,
I proudly present my first ever Interview with none other than our typical engineering student.
Q:How have you been?
A: Are you paid extra for asking this question to to every T,D & H you Interview?Well, Currently I am as happy as the French football team.Happy?
Q:What did you learn in these 3 years of engineering?
A: Answers my friend,Answers.
Q: Answers to what?
A: To the questions that start haunting me exactly 8 hours before the exam.
Q:The answers are squeezed out of the knowledge you gained in these 3 years, arent they?
A: Not at all,I never arrogate the depth of my knowledge. The answers are the ones that have to be copied from the temporary database which is created in the mind only during exams.It is active only twice a semester;during the midsems and the end sems.And as the examination ends, the database is automatically terminated giving me a very slim chance of upgrading my permanent database which has remained almost unchanged over these 3 years.
Q: Why cant you be precise?
A: I never get marks for precise answers,my friend.So I stopped talking straight to the point.
Q: I guess you must also be having the so called Minor exams, dont you?
A: Yes, but I cant afford to strain my brain for a mere 10 marks.So I heavily rely on my fellow students who are willing to slog the whole night for a Deca.
Q: How can you think of resorting to malpractice?Dont you think its wrong?
A: Fortunately, I do NOT think. I just copy down everything my neighbour writes and simply hand over the booklet to the invigilator who always reminds me of KUTCHU.There are ofcourse,plenty of curmudgeons who have a corvine appetite for marks.While writing,they do not like being disturbed in the middle, for they forget the remaining part of the solution and start maundering in themselves from the first line of the memorized solution.Ultimately, after excessive pleading and threatening,they let me peek into their exposed scripts.
Q: You never got caught?
A: We are strictly given orders not to make noise.And they keep reminding us that ""IF WE GET CAUGHT, MY ASS ETC".So we take it for granted that they really dont mind if we arent found guilty.
Q:What is your opinion on the scope of the subjects you finished in the undergraduate course? To what extent do you think will they govern your command over your future endeavours? Do you think mass transfer will play a prominent role?
A: ummmmmm,Well,Ahem...AAL IZZ WELL, AAL IZZ WELL.
Q: How are the classroom sessions helpful to you? Are you one among the stereotyped back-benchers?
A:The sessions help us in giving a clear picture.At the outset, I was a student of unending enthusiasm and unrelenting attitude.I displayed my flamboyant face as I sat in the first bench, trying to get the slightest attention of my professor who excited to euphoria the moment he saw an over anxious face like mine.Over the years, I was made humble.My aggressiveness was assuaged.I then understood that I could never learn those cursed subjects.And all these lectures were pure paradigms to show how complex they eventually grew from their birth.
It was an indirect indication that it was impossible for us to learn the subject.So they followed the beaten path and stressed only on exam oriented questions which I refused to answer.Instead of becoming thirsty for knowledge, I became so satiated with Information that it was pretty difficult for any ounce of knowledge to penetrate.And yeah, after months of repelling, I ended up in the last bench...
Q: How is your love life?
A: Grrrrr....
Q: Finally, How would you describe engineering?
A: UNBEARABLE pain the ass!!
